Monday, August 30, 2010

How to stop serial online dating

For those of us who have turned to the internet to find our dates, there are sizable portions of the loveless looking for love who have been unable to find that perfect someone. It is either they don’t get that second call or they just feel the other person is not good enough.

This article will discuss a few things that have been driving you towards loneliness even though you are online dating. Stop serial dating now and start enjoying life a little more. First dates are usually a combination of a job interview and shopping. Sometimes you can never seem to find what you want or what looks good on you but you need to make exceptions.

If you have too high an expectation either for yourself or the person you are meeting, then be prepared to log on some more and begin your archaeological hunt for someone else to meet up with online. We should not be stuck in a cycle of constant disappointment and we as singles need to get rid of that ‘perfection’ mantra that seems to leading us to isolated states of higher confusions. I blame the Hollywood and magazines for leading us to believe that the perfect person for us should either be in a size 6 dress or look like he is ready to pick get busy in a fight club. There is no Hollywood fairytale and there wont be a score once you leave the scene to a round of applause for you performance.

Its time to cut the parachute and plummet to the real world. Think of perfect looks? How about presentable? Charming? How about just cute? Wealthy? Think willing to spend a little to make a date happy. I cannot stress this enough, if you do not lower your expectations, then you will be in an endless cycle of serial dating looking for something that is not there over a rainbow that does not exist.

And there is no such thing as a one date wonder. There are many factors when it comes to meeting someone for the first time that could affect the behaviour of you or your date. No body gets comfortable with another person almost immediately and all dating gurus always say that if everything goes a –ok on the first date, give it three more to decide whether or not you want to pursue the matter. You cant tell everything about someone else on the first date and you need time to get to know them, that is the nature of relationships and anyone else who says other wise is leaving in a dream world. Once you know this, your entire posture and vibe will change, and the other person will notice that you are not so stiff nor are you so critical anymore – you will a much ore pleasant date to be with. These are just some of the tips that you should follow if you want to stop failing at online dating.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Watch our Bollywood! Indian dating sites are cropping up over the internet

I think that online dating has really taken off in all its forms. It did start its roots in the more liberal Western societies; and that came as no surprise with our sonorous view of dating. Online dating was viewed with a lot of suspicion for quite a long time; most saw it as another avenue for social problems to arise, but in the end of the day, society proved that such a medium to find partners would not be the exclusive playground or the nefarious and dangerous individuals. Online dating filled a need, a need by busy professionals who had to time to include themselves in the social scene, a need of overly shy people who could not muster enough to face social situations.

It was a need commanded by people who wanted to rid themselves of the constant failures of dating and use an almost mathematical approach to dating, narrowing people right down to the favourite colour. And now, it has routed traditionalism, but not in a bad way. Modernity has started to hit out and even the most traditional societies of today’s world and people now see the value of online dating. The stigma is not slowly disappearing, it has gone completely and those of us who still look at it with suspicion should pinch ourselves and wake up from this self creating dystopia that we live in.

Online dating is fun, it is great and anyone can meet their future partner through it. Indian dating sites are a testament to this realisation. I have a few Indian friends, and they have recounted me stories of arranged marriages or of lost loves. Mind you, not all of them are unhappy; some of them have found perfect lives within the walls of traditionalism that has been presented to them since their birth. But there is an outlet now, especially for those who have left behind a life and reached out for another.

It is not a question of promiscuity, it is not a question of blatant liberalism in the face of quaint traditionalism – it is a question of choice. Love should never be limited to where one is, where one can see and how far one can reach. Love is as borderless an expression and it can be transmitted through satellite and phone lines. Without the internet, the dynamics of Indian dating that exist today would not even be there. I applaud the internet dating scene for revolutionising and introducing dating to all sectors of society.

In the end of the day, I think it will pervade the world. Love should not be limited, it should be the horizon we all work towards, and the broader the horizon, the more unique our experience. So watch our Bollywood! The love scenes might be coming to a shore near you and there might be an intercontinental mix into it. Indian, Persian, Chinese – more and more of us should be dating online!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

3 Great Tips On How To Get A Guy Back

The fairy tell has ended and your prince has left you. But all may not be lost just yet. If you are serious in getting tips on how to get a guy back, then this may be the place to look.

Never ever plead or beg a guy to give you another chance. Firstly, it is demeaning both to yourself and the relationship as well, as it can never be based on pity of forced emotions. He must want to take you back and no amount of wheedling is going to be the foundations of a successful reconciliation. Sure, it might work sometimes and pity might override whatever emotions were there, but it will not last, that is guaranteed to be true. If you do want him back, it has to be on the terms of understanding, mutual respect and love. He will lose all respect for you if you do this, if you undermine yourself and make a scene. It might even be enough to erase whatever emotions he had for you in the first place so avoid this situation at all costs.

Use the information that you have gained about him to your advantage. In the end of the day, with the exception of his mother, you are the person that probably knows him the best and you know what he likes, what his weaknesses are and what he responds to emotionally. It might seem a bit underhanded but you are on the losing end of this struggle. He has probably decided that there is no hope for the relationship and the anger is fresh on his mind. Appearing out of nowhere with no ammunition will only lead you to get shot down once again, and it will only reaffirm his anger and his feelings for you. So have a plan and come prepared. Talk to his friends and even his family if possible. Draw up a strategy with the things that he likes best and execute the plan.

The last piece of advice might seem hard to follow, but by looking at all the bad relationship endings in the past, this has to be one of the best advices given to women who want to get their guy back. Let him go and leave him alone. Live your own life and enjoy it, get over the initial sadness and hold on to the memories that you both had. When the time comes, you will know whether or not he really still feels anything for you. This is the best test when it comes to getting your man back. There really is no point forcing him when there is no more love to be squeezed from this relationship. The true test is to find out whether there are any lingering emotions that he has for you and eventually he will call you and things can progress from there. Never, never force a situation because at the end of the day, it can only end up bad for the both of you.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

How To Get Your Man Back In 30 Days Or Less

If you didn’t know it, there are actually tried and proven ways to get your man back in 30 days or less. While there may be a lot of men in the world today, there are ways to compartmentalise them and predict certain general patterns of behaviour. Once you add in your own personal knowledge of him, then you will have on your hands the potent ingredients to get him back and make him stay there this time.

Of course, this is dependent on the reason why you guys broke up in the first place. It was for some trivial, explosive argument, then chances are you have a good shot at getting him back. If the reason is much more serious and goes emotionally deeper, then you have to look at whether or not there is hope in salvaging the relationship. Nevertheless, here are some methods to get your man back. It is all down to your image, and that is the most important thing. Your man will have an idea of how you used to look like and he has branded that image with bad emotions. Also, you have to get into the psychology of man who cannot resist something fresh and something beautiful.

So before you decide to initiate any sort of physical contact, you need to go for a make over. Look better than you did before and wear something that will knock him off his feet and keep a weary eye out for other men. The eyes never lie and if he brightens up when he sees you, you know he is thoroughly impressed with that he sees. With this, you also trigger the jealous switch within your ex boyfriends. Now every man in your office, on the street, hell, on the moon, is competition. Now that you look so good, he cannot bear the fact that someone else might be there with you and touching you. The jealous switch is a great tool to use and use it wisely. Play with it if you can.

Allude to the fact that so many other men are asking you out and make him seethe where he sits, but of course do not take it too far. Some men will actually switch off once they know you are sleeping with someone else, so just hint that you have become very popular around the local StarBucks. Wait a while before you initiate any contact to let him cool down and maybe miss you a bit. This will further amplify the effect of your new look and maybe even completely floor him at first meet.

Once he has had all the drinking sessions with his mates and once he as decided that he made a mistake but is to proud to call you, then and only then do you call him. The right time is about a month, some say 2 weeks, but it would be better to give it some time. Now its time to get your man back. Get him to meet you and you will instantly see results – guaranteed!

Monday, August 9, 2010

Why are more and more women dating online?

The new age woman is quite different from the subservient housewives that populated homes all over the world not but a century ago. Neither are they sitting pretty in their chaise lounges, waiting for their prince charming to come serenade them, or perhaps bear gifts to their fathers as an offer for their hand in marriage. Times have changed, and the traditional garb of the women has been replaced with the power suit. Cooking utensils have been replaced with folios, PDA’s and attaché cases.

The new woman of the 21st century is the get up and go, career climbing, working professional. They are educated, informed and empowered to do whatever they want. No longer do they live under the patriarchal shadow of the industrial world, they are leaders in their own right and have stamped their presence in all sectors of society. What this means that these women no longer have the time to knit, nor do they have the time to socialize. They are the new breadwinners of the world, from the corporate jet setter to the business owner, and they simply cannot afford the time to find the right man amidst their busy schedules.

This is one of the main reasons why more and more women are looking to the internet to find dates. In a recent poll, it was observed that just a few years ago, the numbers of men and women were unequal, with more than 60% of online singles made up of men. This year, dating sites have posted some telling figures – the number of women dating online have equalled, and in some cases actually surpassed the number of men on a single dating site. When asked a lot of women say that internet dating gives them time to slowly establish relationships as well as giving them a wide range of choice. The secret about women is that most of them do not really like to rush into a relationship.

The whole ‘head over heels’ and ‘fools rush in’ mentality is very 1980’s and has not survived till today. Women like to find out every detail about a guy, they like to run a list of the good and bad points in their head and discuss it with their girlfriends. Also, women are all about content. They love to keep conversation histories and every little thing given to them – especially when download and hard disks are added to the equation. Online dating gives women breathing space and the ability to fully weight the options before committing to anything. Also, the security of a lot of sites and the imbalance that dating sites always give to women (a necessary function of online heterosexual dating) means that the ball is normally in their court and if there is anything a woman likes to have is control over a situation. This is why more and more women are dating online and looking at the figures, they are only set to rise further and further as sites improve their infrastructure and give true interactivity to onl ine dating.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

3 things to look out for in an adult dating site

Logging online, you have probably found a few good adult dating sites which you are considering to join. The odds are, you might just find the perfect no. 2 to join you in your journey towards life and love through any one of these sites. This article will help you to increase those odds by a little bit by telling you what to look out for before joining these sites.

There are many nefarious and porn laden sites masquerading as dating sites, roping in the loveless and slapping them with a heavy membership – only to find their true love lying down in front of a webcam in nothing more than their birthday suits. Not exactly what you expected and what exactly you should avoid. The first thing you should look out for is how long the website or service has been around. Most likely, staying power is the one true feature of a legitimate dating site that can start you off to finding that special someone. Many of these black hat sites don’t last a few months at a time, mainly because they are either shut down, or they have a lack of members, which means no profits to maintain. Legitimate sites often have been around for years, sometimes as far back as the start of online dating on the web.

Also, make sure you don’t have to pay any exorbitant fees when you first join and there should always be a trial period. Look out for the human factor as well, if all their ‘matches’ for you look like models on a runway, then your spider sense should be tingling. Dating is a very real and very human process and a site trying to sell you lookers often have a hidden agenda. Information is also the key feature when it comes to finding the right person. A good dating site will get you your match sometimes down to the exact iota of information, from interests, movie tastes, what type of soft drinks, whether or not they like to exercise – everything down to the very colour they like on their clothes.

This will match you up to a person who already has the same interests in you and if the accompanying photo is agreeable, then that very profile might be the one eating breakfast with you, walking down the aisle with you and might be raising your children with you. At the very least, it will get your love life going again and put back the excitement in your life. Never wake up alone in bed and have something to look forward to other than work or another night in the club realising you’re going to be trudging home alone. You’re not hopeless, that is the last thing anyone is and everyone deserves the colour of love to brighten up their lives. These are the 3 and more things to look out for in an adult dating site and with the right one, you will find the person of your dreams.